HHH's cooking corner
by MegaeraSelene
Summary: Triple H is a super hero. A mutant. Loved by many but also loathed by many. He gets an offer to get his own show. He agrees. he might be loved by many, but most of his co-superheroes aren't. He's going to show the world they're normal too. Follow our protagonist in his journey in the kitchen. And see if Hunter's right. AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Intro**  
This is a spinoff of my story 'Savage land.'  
I shall briefly explain what it's about so you don't have to read it if you don't want to.

Simply put. This is a different reality. And most of the characters have superpowers.  
Some are heroes others are super villains, you'll notice who's who.  
Our protagonist is known as the hero Triple H/Hunter, but goes as Paul Levesque through ordinary live.  
His power? The ability to acquire the abilities of others and automatically use them in a superior fashion to the original. (Automatically Enhanced Ability Acquisition)

* * *

Hunter sat in a conference room. After a long day of saving the world a news reporter stopped him. She said her boss had an offer he couldn't refuse. An offer that would benefit mutant kind, such as himself. Hunter was dubious about the proposal but decided to follow her anyway. An offer is an offer, he'd decline if he didn't like the proposal.

He was really curious about the offer though. He had an idea, seeing as how it was a network station who contacted him, but he just returned from being kidnapped. He had his mind wiped which thankfully returned, for the most part. But he, and the other victims, still hadn't confronted their enemy.

Hunter groaned. He couldn't accept the offer, no matter what kind of offer it was. He was going to be busy. He kind of.. wanted to accept though. He looked up as the door creaked open and footsteps got louder and closer.

"Mr… Hunter." A man, dressed in a nice suite, said.

"Mr. Johnson was it?" Hunter answered as he stood up, reaching out his hand. The man looked at Hunter's hand and gave a dismissal wave.

"Yes, let's cut to the chase, we, Channel 7 want to offer you a show, people at home would like to know more about their great hero." Mr. Johnson said, and he took a seat.

"Like a reality show?" Hunter asked, sitting back down. He didn't like the man. A simple handshake wouldn't kill him. He didn't have the muties. Hunter sniggered a little. Muties. He shook his head and made a serious face.

"Yes."

"I have to decline."

"Don't be too hasty, we're willing to make a different kind of program, how about a talk show? You could invite other heroes. Some are still feared. That way you can show people how your kind interacts and how you think about things like politics and the current economy."

"People still fear me." Hunter mumbled. "I know what I want. I want my own cooking corner. I can invite a friend each show and we'll cook a meal together."

Mr. Johnson laughed a little but stopped as he saw Hunter's honest expression.  
"S-sure, we can arrange that, but remember, you can't sign with other channels!"

"Deal."

* * *

"And that's how it went!" Paul said laughing.

"A COOKING SHOW!" Stephanie yelled. "HOW ABOUT TRYING TO HELP MUTANTKIND GET A BETTER REPUTATION? PAUL, WHAT IF THEY FIND OUT YOUR IDENTITY! AND THAT MAN OBVIOUSLY DIDN'T LIKE YOU, HE ONLY OFFERED YOU A SHOW BECAUSE THEY WANT TO BE THE FIRST STATION WITH A MUTANT SHOW!"

"I will. And don't worry, they won't. I agreed so people will see mutants and other super powered beings cooking like normal humans, interacting with normal humans, they'll see we're just like them."

"Just like them.." Stephanie mumbled. "YOU HAVE POWERS, YOU'RE NOTHING LIKE US!"

"Other than the powers we are. You disappoint me Steph, I thought you'd be happy for me." Paul mumbled, slumping down in his seat.

"I'm sorry, I'm happy for you, really! I'm just stressed." Stephanie quickly said, placing her hand on his shoulder.

"Good, I'm starting tomorrow. It's live." Paul said happily, perking up.

"WHAAAT?"

* * *

Superheroes and cooking shows.. an odd combination.  
Triple H, super heroes and cooking shows.. A BLAST.  
Will the first chapter be going along smoothly? Or will a villain appear? So many possible events.

Tune in Monday for the first chapter in celebration of the 1000th episode of RAW!


	2. First episode

*Music*  
It's time to bake a cake, this is how you bake it.  
Time to boil the soup, oh no, no don't spill it.

* * *

"HELLO EVERYONE! I'm Hunter and this is HHH's cooking corner!" Hunter said. "For my very first episode my guest cook will be, my very good friend, my partner in crime fighting, THE SHOWSTOPPING HEART BREAK KID!"

The small audience cheered as the HBK came out and waved. He chuckled and gave the crowd a charming smile.

"Hello Hunter, it's nice to see you again."

"It's nice to see you too Shawn." Hunter said. "Do you guys want to know what we'll make today?"

The crowd made some noise.

"We're going to make…." Hunter said, looking at Shawn. "Venison shish kebab! AND, my dear pal Shawn did the hunting and brought the meat! Of course we had it prepared beforehand."

Hunter chuckled.

"We wouldn't want to do that on air do we." He said, scratching the back of his head.

Shawn undid his backpack and placed it on the countertop. He unzipped it and took out a pack of meat. The audience shrieked lightly. Shawn grinned and held up his hands.

"Don't worry everyone! I brought enough deer meat FOR EVERYONE TO TAKE HOME."

An electric operated cheer filled the room. Shawn was slightly taken back with the lack of enthusiasm of the crowd. He shrugged it off and continued smiling.

"Now for our ingredients!" Hunter begin. "Shawn, I'd like to give you the honor.."

"Of course." Shawn answered and he pushed Hunter aside. "The ingredients.. for 36 skewers are 1 cup of soy sauce, 2 tablespoons of white sugar, 2 teaspoons of ground ginger and 2 teaspoons of dry mustard powder, 2 tablespoons of garlic powder, 1 teaspoon of cayenne pepper, 1 cup of vegetable oil, 10 pounds of venison meat, either already cut in cubes or do so yourself beforehand and 36 wooden skewers."

"You forgot, Shawn.." Hunter hisses, pushing Shawn aside. "to mention they also need 12 onions, cut into large chunks, 20 jalapeno's, stemmed and cut in half AND 8 green bell peppers also cut in large chunks."

Hunter turned around and washed his hands before he grabbed a bowl. He smiled at the audience before throwing the soy sauce, sugar, ginger, mustard powder, garlic powder and cayenne powder into the large bowl.

"Pshhh, Hunter." Shawn whispered, his back to the audience as he dried his hands. "You need to tell the audience what you're doing."

Hunter looked up and smiled. "First you get a bowl, then you put the soy sauce, sugar, ginger, mustard powder, garlic powder and cayenne powder in. Then you whisk it until the sugar has dissolved."

Hunter leaned his head forwards so the camera on his head would show the inside of the bowl on a big screen behind them. He threw in the vegetable oil.

"Then we whisk in the vegetable oil." Hunter said, stirring the bowl with a whisk.

"Don't try this at home folks!" Shawn said. "Nah, just kidding, I'll show you exactly how to do it at home."

Shawn stood on the other side of the counter top. He had a small piece of meat.

"So this is how we cut the meat into cubes." Shawn said as he cut the meat in a inhuman tempo. "See how evenly I do it without even measuring it, if it's too much of a hassle you could easily get this done by the butcher or just buy prepackaged venison cubes. Don't go hunting though, I'm a professional."

Hunter walked to the refrigerator and took out a bowl. He dumped the content into his bowl. He looked up.

"Then you throw the meat into the bowl," he said as he was kneading the meat through the marinade. "Be sure you wash your hands well beforehand. Between the fingers, under the nails and preferably your lower arms too! Just in case! And also afterwards of course."

The women in the audience looked at each other, as if they didn't know that. Shawn skipped to a grill and preheated it.

"Preheat your grill, preferably an outdoor grill on medium heat, and lightly oil the grate." Shawn said as he did so.

"While the grill is heating, remove the venison from the marinade, and squeeze of excess. Discard the remaining marinade." Hunter said as he placed the meat down on a cutting board. He discarded the marinade and went back to the meat. "Thread the venison cubes onto the skewers, alternating with the onion, jalapeno and bell pepper."

Shawn took the skewers that were ready and placed them on the grill.

"Cook the skewers on the preheated grill, turning it occasionally, until it's cooked to your desired degree of doneness. Medium-rare would take about 10 min."

"And this, dear people, is how you make venison shish kebab!" Hunter said, drying his now clean hands.

"Deer people." Shawn said, sniggering lightly.

"A few tv crew members will be handing out some so you, my dear audience can taste them." Hunter said.

3 crew members appeared and handed out skewers of shish kebab. Hunter jumped off the platform and walked towards a couple on the first row. The woman squealed a little and the man just stared harshly, taking a bite out of the shish kebab.

"May I ask you how it tastes?"

"Oh, it tastes really good, very heroic too, and tough, but nice." The lady said, grabbing Hunter's biceps.

"Okay…" Hunter answered awkwardly ripping his arm away from the woman's grasp. "How about you sir."

"It's seems easy to make, the taste isn't too bad either. I would like to try to make this for my wife." The man said, pulling his wife closer.

"You heard it folks! It's easy to make and very tasteful!" Hunter said, staring into the camera. "Now I'll give you some tips. If you use wooden skewers, soak them in water for about 15 min. that way they'll splinter less. And regardless of what type of skewers you use, apply a light coat of cooking oil before threading vegetables and meat, that way it will slide off easier! And would you like some wine to wash down the deer meat? No problem, syrah wines really compliment the deer meat!"

"So Hunter," Shawn said. "We've only been busy for about 20 minutes."

"That's right my friend," Hunter said with a big smile into the camera. "We'll also show the audience… how to make a fast dessert!"

"Oh really now?" Shawn asked.

"Yes! We'll make a sparkling lemon-strawberry float."

"That sure sounds yummy, but will it go with my beloved, delicious deer meat?"

"It sure will pal!" Hunter answered smiling widely. "The cold taste of lemon and strawberry really washes away the taste of deer."

"Well, I can't wait to make these floats. How will we do that?"

"First we go through the ingredients, the ingredients we'll need are lemon sherbet, frozen strawberries, sparkling wine and some sprigs of mint!"

Shawn went to the freezer and took out the lemon sherbet and some frozen strawberries. Hunter plucked some sprigs of mint off a plant and laid them ready. A crewmember had already removed their dirty dishes while the camera wasn't pointed towards the stage.

The two stood behind the kitchen top. Hunter grabbed two bottles of sparkling wine and placed it between the two.

"Now Shawn, if you would please like to follow my example." Hunter said.

Hunter grabbed two ice cream bowls from underneath the kitchen top and placed one in front of himself and one in front of Shawn.

"First we get a good handful of crushed strawberries." Hunter said.

He grabbed a big hand of strawberries and crushed them with his hand. He dropped the strawberry pieces in the bowl. He looked at Shawn, who did the same.

"Now we sprinkle some sparkling wine on top."

Both men did so. Hunter stopped as he reached about the halve of the bowl. Shawn quickly stopped too. Hunter took a spoon and lightly mixed it.

"After you mix it very lightly, Scoop some lemon sherbet and drop it in the bowl." Hunter said.

Hunter scooped out some sherbet out of the container and placed it in the middle of the ice cream bowl. He grabbed the spoon and got some of the sparkling wine/strawberry mix and sprinkled it over the sherbet. The lemon sherbet took on a red color. Hunter took the little mint sprig and placed it on top.

"And now it's ready to get served, the mint is optional. So if you don't like mint, it still tastes great without!"

"You should have said that earlier!" Shawn said with a whiny voice. "I don't like mint but I already placed it on top of my ice cream!"

"Remember folks," Hunter said, facing the camera. "Sherbet is an ice cream, SORBET is NOT."

"Now my sherbet is tasting like mint."

"Just take it out." Hunter said, grabbing the sprig.

"You dirtied my dessert!"

"Goodbye folks! For today's recipes or new recipes visit my website, down below!" Hunter said, pointing down.

Shawn slammed his hand, a knife hand strike, into the kitchen top, cracking it, and it fell apart.

"Damn it Shawn, now I'll need to buy a new kitchen top."

"It's not my fault, it wasn't strong enough!"

"My kitchen top wasn't invulnerable like you!"

"It wasn't as good looking as me either!" Shawn said, smiling widely into the camera. "Tune in next time!"

Shawn waved into the camera and the screen at people's home faded. Hunter was just staring blankly.

* * *

"HUNTER! HUNTER!" a man yelled, running after him.

"Mr. Johnson." Hunter mumbled.

Mr. Johnson looked at the audience as they slowly left. He folded his hands together and sighed. He released his hands and placed one on Hunter's shoulder.

"Hunter, buddy, this wasn't exactly what we had in mind."

Hunter glared at the hand on his shoulder. Just a day ago the man wouldn't even shake his hand.

"I invited a friend, we cooked, what would you have me do? Dance?"

"No, but you're a superhero. Maybe you can talk about old battles or foes during the show."

"People won't know how to prepare the food."

"We can place subtitles."

"I guess.."

"HEY HELMSLEY! GOT A MINUTE?" a female voice yelled.

"Remember, just make it a little more exciting." Mr. Johnson said as he walked away.

"Stephanie? What are you doing here?" Hunter whispered. "Wearing… that.."

"I can't show my identity right? So I dressed up as a hero. Like it?" Stephanie asked, turning around.

Hunter nodded. Stephanie wore a unitard, high heels and a mask. Her hair up in a ponytail.

"You're so heroic and tough!"

"That's not my fault! I have lots of fans."

"But you're so nice." Stephanie mocked.

"It's not funny."

"Yes it was, now let's go before people find out who you really are."

"Don't worry so much, they won't find out."

"Eventually they will, I'm sure of it."

"HEY PAUL-" Shawn yelled, he looked around, everyone turned to look at him. "INA! What are you doing here?"

"So close." Stephanie mumbled holding her index and thumb close together.

* * *

That was close. Having two identities might be a little confusing.  
Hunter's asked to step up his game and add some excitement to the show.  
What will happen next time?  
Who will be the next guest? Friend or foe?  
Will the show get crashed by an enemy?  
Will his true identity get revealed?

Tune in next time!

(Thanks for faves and reviews!)

&

(Yay for the 1000th episode of RAW! Here's to another 1000 episodes. *cheers*)


End file.
